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DIARY OF AN UNKNOWN WHALER

 

Thurzday, 6th Disembir 1883.
Deer dehray,
Went on thi Fiyfee thi day wee Wattie. Nivir agehn! Thi thing iz, eez went an took a fansay ti thi lassie wha selz thi tickits. So mugginz me hid to sit aboot liyk a feechee peess at a picnic fir fehv crossinz o'the Tiy, whiyul Wattie chansiz eez hand. 'Fansay a wak roond thi cattle merkit when yuv feenisht yir shuft?' saiz Wattie. Yi shood'uv herd ir! Man, did shi no jist go spair. Pit Wattie riyt in eez plais shi did. 'Lassies fey meh end o'thi toon dinna wak roond nay cattle merkit.' shi says. 'We hay waks doon beh Magdullin Green.' Eh jist coodna stand beh an watch Wattie beein tokt doon ti liyk that, spehshully fay a wummin kinductir. So eh went an stood it thi back o'thi boat an mindid mi ain bizniss. That's when eh seen it. A huge Humfy-backit whale, wee a tail thi sehz o' thi provist's hoos, an a noze liyk eh dinna ken whut. Thir wiz a fyoo wee rowin boats skootin aboot, trehin ti catch it. Eh eevin saw sum bairnz chuckin stainz at it. Thi tickit lassie stood ah thon smug wiy an saiz to Wattie, 'If yi catch iz that whale, ull think aboot gayin ti a pehrtay wee yi on hugminay.' Pair Wattie, eh think eez gone saft. 'Nay bahthir darlin' ee Went an saiz ti ir.

 

 

 
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Dundonian for Beginners - Written by Mick McCluskey - Copyright © 1990-2005
The right of Mick McCluskey to be identified as the author of this work has been asserted by him in accordance with the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988.

Illustrations by Belinda Langlands - Copyright © 1990-2005

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